We all know who I'm talking about. The couple who look offended when you dance near them. The old woman who glares at you and shakes her head as you pass. The upset girlfriend or wife who stares daggers at her significant other as s/he glances up at you.
I find it rather amusing to be honest.
So what do we do?
1. You can ignore them. Just carry on regardless and focus on the ones who are enjoying themselves.
2. You can try and coax them out (like dancing for the girlfriend instead of the partner).
3. Dance near them as much as possible to provoke.
Now that last one seems a bit harsh and unprofessional, however, in some situations it works!
On Friday I danced at Ocean Basket in Jeffrey's Bay. There was: a table of teenagers who were very shy to look, a couple of older ladies who gave us very disapproving looks (even shaking there heads and muttering as we approached), and a couple who buried their faces into their food when we started dancing.
Let's start with the couple who were very interested in their food. I ignored their attitude, danced passed their table but didn't engage. By the end they were clapping and smiled at us. I think that by not forcing them to look, they slowly became comfortable.
Now the teenagers. I approached and danced for them individually, making eye contact with each girl whilst doing a different movement "for them alone". This individualised attention made them more interested in watching the "cool moves" (and probably feel a bit special that I danced for them) than being embarrassed about watching belly dancers. By the end of the 2nd set, they were all filming us.
The older ladies. At first I tried to engage with them, but I got pursed lips, disapproving eyes and slight shaking of their heads. It was clear that engaging wouldn't work and I didn't want to ignore them. So ... I provoked. I made it a point to stop by their table, make eye contact with everybody near by except for them. I would turn my back to them and shimmy or do omis, go side on and undulate, face them them with some sways lifting my arms up and following with my eyes. How did they react? They slowly defrosted and ended up smiling and having fun.
I think one of the most important things to remember when dancing at a restaurant is that you are there to entertain. You have to try and draw people out of themselves so that they can have fun. This requires the ability to read body language and judge the best way to approach helping them out of their shells. You must break their preconceived ideas about belly dancing and draw them into the experience. I believe that is hardest part of dancing at a restaurant. Not the improvising, not the moving between tables, but the entertaining. It is exhausting but so much fun.