The Very Enthusiastic Patron and "The Creep"

A little while ago I wrote about disapproving patrons. Since then I've had a few requests to write about the opposite - very enthusiastic patrons - and the "creepy guy in the back". I'm putting the very enthusiastic patron and "the creep" in the same post because sometimes they overlap. I'm essentially talking about 3 different types of people you may encounter in you performing journey: the very enthusiastic patron, the creepy person and the very enthusiastic creep.

Let's start with the most fun one ...

The Very Enthusiastic Patron.

They are the people that feed your energy. They are clapping, dancing in their chairs or even with you. Their enjoyment is contagious. As a dancer you can draw from their happiness, and boost your own confidence and connection with others. The best is when you have a whole room filled with these people. They appreciate you, you are all having fun, and you are left on such a high that you could dance all night. I find this is often the case at bachelorette parties. I can't help beaming, and putting more and more of my soul into my dancing. Sometimes there will be a section in a restaurant that starts to dance with you. It's bliss. The best kind of gigs!

Then there's...

"The Creep".

This person gives you an uneasy feeling. They may sit admiring you with a scary look on their face, they may speak to you when you are near them and what they say is a bit ... creepy. I once encountered an extreme version of this when I started performing. I danced at a market festival here in little old P.E. Afterwards a guy lurking in the back of the crowd was introduced to me by his very enthusiastic girlfriend. His response was "Hmmmm, belly dancer", as he lifted his eyebrows and did subtle pelvic thrusts, and not like he was trying to mimic dance moves, more like an unconscious tick. Shudder

Please note, not all "creeps" are men and not all of them are necessarily bad people. They just give you a feeling of uneasiness in the context you are both in.

We suggest to our dancers that if you encounter an audience member who makes you uneasy, tell your fellow dancers and try to avoid going too near or making eye contact with them (which is hard when someone is staring at you with an intense look).

The Very Enthusiastic Creep

This person is up and dancing with you, showing great enthusiasm, but also gives you the creeps. Maybe s/he is trying to touch you and you aren't comfortable with that, or their dance moves are a bit inappropriate. They might be overly-friendly or possibly drunk.

I find this one slightly more difficult to navigate. You should never have to be in a situation that makes you uncomfortable and not be able to stand up for yourself. You have to be firm but polite, all while keeping the atmosphere jolly. A firm "no touching" might be enough. That's the furtherest I've had to go (barring the time security had to remove the drunk guy off the stage area after he wandered on and tried to smack my bottom).

I personally don't think dancers should be touched save for a hand on the shoulder. Others don't like that either. Be clear on what you find acceptable, set your boundaries and even practice saying no to fellow dancers in role play if you are worried you'll freeze in that situation.

You are going to meet all types of people on your dance journey. It is always important to remember that YOU are in control of your body. You can choose how to respond to situations you find yourself in. Enjoy your audience and all the characters therein. If you are uncomfortble, have an action plan. It's always best to be firm with your boundaries and if someone tries to push them, don't give in.